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April 17, 2008
MOST UNWANTED SONG
In 1994, Russian conceptual artists Vitaly Komar and Alex Melamid hired market research firms to poll citizens of several countries to determine the most desired and unwanted attributes for paintings. Once statistically informed, Komar and Melamid produced the works favored by a majority in each country. The results are hilarious; the United States' most favored painting is above.
In collaboration with Komar and Melamid, composer Dave Soldier extended the project to the musical realm in 1997. Soldier polled over 500 people to determine the characteristics of the "most unwanted music." His findings:
The most unwanted music is over 25 minutes long, veers wildly between loud and quiet sections, between fast and slow tempos, and features timbres of extremely high and low pitch, with each dichotomy presented in abrupt transition. The most unwanted orchestra was determined to be large, and features the accordion and bagpipe (which tie at 13% as the most unwanted instrument), banjo, flute, tuba, harp, organ, synthesizer (the only instrument that appears in both the most wanted and most unwanted ensembles). An operatic soprano raps and sings atonal music, advertising jingles, political slogans, and "elevator" music, and a children's choir sings jingles and holiday songs. The most unwanted subjects for lyrics are cowboys and holidays, and the most unwanted listening circumstances are involuntary exposure to commercials and elevator music. Therefore, it can be shown that if there is no covariance--someone who dislikes bagpipes is as likely to hate elevator music as someone who despises the organ, for example--fewer than 200 individuals of the world's total population would enjoy this piece.
Armed with this information, Soldier produced the Most Unwanted Music. You can hear it here:
The Most Unwanted Song {mp3}
Lyrics by Nina Mankin. Komar & Melamid on the bass drum.
Jesus fucking christ, dear reader, it is absolutely breathtaking. Please listen to it. I was crying from laughter.
Yo, I'm ropin' up my saddle for the long long ride
Every time I see the desert there's something inside says
Yo, yo, this is the life
Give me open land and a big ol' knife
To get some bear, deer, even a snake
I light me a fire, do the shake and bake
I say yo, yo, I'm a cowboy now.
Incidentally, Soldier also produced "The Most Wanted Song," driven by these survey results:
The most favored ensemble, determined from a rating by participants of their favorite instruments in combination, comprises a moderately sized group (three to ten instruments) consisting of guitar, piano, saxophone, bass, drums, violin, cello, synthesizer, with low male and female vocals singing in rock/r&b style. The favorite lyrics narrate a love story, and the favorite listening circumstance is at home. The only feature in lyric subjects that occurs in both most wanted and unwanted categories is "intellectual stimulation." Most participants desire music of moderate duration (approximately 5 minutes), moderate pitch range, moderate tempo, and moderate to loud volume, and display a profound dislike of the alternatives. If the survey provides an accurate analysis of these factors for the population, and assuming that the preference for each factor follows a Gaussian (i.e. bell-curve) distribution, the combination of these qualities, even to the point of sensory overload and stylistic discohesion, will result in a musical work that will be unavoidably and uncontrollably "liked" by 72 plus or minus 12% (standard deviation; Kolmogorov-Smirnov statistic) of listeners.
Most Wanted Song {mp3}
Living Colour's Vernon Reid plays guitar on the Most Wanted Song!!!
More links:
UbuWeb: Komar and Melamid & Dave Soldier
Posted by caps at April 17, 2008 11:26 AM